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My assholes just for shitting

Intro-deuce your butt to an 8pk of renewable Bamboo Toilet Paper. Cancel anytime. You can shred some waves on a surfboard, rip the fabric of space and time can we do that yet? I learned the hard way. Today, we are here to walk you through anal fissures so you are well-equipped if you ever meet the same fate.
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Why "Bruno" is bad for the gays

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Oops, I Ripped My… Butthole?: Your Guide to Anal Fissures — TUSHY

First -- in a reversal of the old principles of immunology where the merest hint of the antigen is introduced into the host body -- this portrayal of an out, mincing, bubble-brained queen would be such a huge dose of gay, a veritable balloon drop of queer, that America would be inoculated; further, in an age where gay men and lesbians are clamoring to be seen as safe, hetero-normative, marriage-minded, child-rearing responsible citizens, it would be good to remember the adage that we are only as emancipated as the least among us, the most upsetting and problematic, and that Baron Cohen, in embodying an inexorably femme gay man who lives for sex and can't even butch his way into a button-down collar, would be a perfect demonstration of that. Finally, I had hoped that here we'd have a character whose homosexuality would be just one strand of his essential self -- along with his ignorance, narcissism and two-tone Zac Efron-last-week hair; a trait that is separable and easily teased-away. At long last, sexual inversion would take its place in the dustbin of history alongside other empty referenda on character such as red hair and left-handedness. He is an open hydrant of empty, venal ignorance, a fame-chasing, grandiose fucktard, all because he is a cockaholic his term. The repeated pistoning of sucking dick has scrambled his brains, just as surely as a muddler pulverizes mint leaves. Perez Hilton has the sobriety, moral rectitude and class of Lewis Lapham by comparison. The power dynamic is completely reversed here.
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Oops, I Ripped My... Butthole? – Your Guide to Anal Fissures

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